So, a few nights back I ended up chatting with the mysterious K. As I've said on Twitter I've told him much I'm not really prepared to put onto blogs, because putting things on blogs can cement all your crazy ideas into a solid form that, once witnessed, often can't quite be forgotten.
One of the topics we quite often come back to is crazy exes, and in particular this came up when I mentioned my Lovesong Playlist project (more of which... elsewhere...) - it's crazy how often certain moments, certain situations, get linked to songs that for a long time after remind you in painful clarity of that situation. It's not my place to explain exactly why The Killer's Mr Brightside and an un-named Genesis album occupied a dark place in his heart at one time, but it's fair to say the manner in which I've been dumped from previous relationships seems quite tame in comparison. It may also be that he's even more prone to meladrama than me, but that doesn't make it any the less painful. After all, without being part of a psychic hive mind to share experiences we only have our own experiences of pain to register current hurts by.
I reminded K of the shared conversion from a while back (again... elsewhere online...), about how Cat Deeley had declared that, when younger, she looked for funny and exciting, and now she reflects how she'd like someone kind to grow old with. Sure, I talked a whole lot about that somewhere. And K began to tell me how he'd frequently met a girl working at the internet cafe he frequents who had increasingly been making eye contact, been trying to talk to him, being a little coy and showing some of those I-interested-but-shy signs. And it hit him just like that. He told me he'd become desensitised to romance and love a lot over past experiences, and that he didn't get the sudden spark of love at first sight with this girl. And I shrugged, and told him a little bit about the book I'm reading, Let Love Find You, and how it says if you chill out and stop broadcast your desperate need so often, if you're still within yourself and become receptive, you find a lot more.
"Whoa..." he said, as he often does when he has a lightbulb moment.... "You're right... what if... WHAT IF... someone was RIGHT UNDER YOUR NOSE?" And we discussed how sometimes it's a whole lot of shit putting yourself under pressure to go out on a date and interview each other, especially if one or both of you are desperate and not a little nuts... and how actually it's nice if you slowly get to know each other, and it's organic, and things kind of happen of their own accord...
I smiled. "Summer helps too. So many relationships have started in summer... but then, quite often, by the end of winter, they fall apart." K told me "A friend of mine had this idea. Things expand over summer, and contract over winter. Even relationships. That's why you should never start a relationship during summer."
Well, that's told me. I was thinking August might be my month. Ah well. Roll on winter.